Road Kill Chili
Dependin on where ya’ll live the ingredients for this one may be a little hard to find. They tell me in thre city they got fellars what drives around in trucks wearin funny suits like spacemen and takes all the road kill afore the good folks can git to it. Down here we ain’t got the problem. All we do is go down yonder to route 127 an pick up whatever we need. Seems to always plenty for all the cuzins. I called a friend who lives in Ohio and he told me you can git this stuff in somethun called a “supermarket”?
Well anyway good luck with the fixins… here we go
1can diced tomaters with chilies and onions
1 can hot chili beans
Pound r’ so of possum, skwurell, deer iffin yur real lucky, or iffin them fellars beat you to the good stuff hamburger
1 pack chili mix (this is a might smart cheaper than buyin all the stuff by itself, so I like it real good)
Here how to cook it…
Git yerself a pan bigginuff to hold everything
Put it on yer stove and start gittin it hot
Toss in yer roadkill (its best iffin you can grind it up or chop it real good within yer hatchet)
Cook it until ya git it kinda brown and theres lots a grease comin out of it
Git ya somethun what to pour out the meat and leave the grease behind (I got an old shirt what works pretty good. The grease runs thru and the meat stays put. You can use yer maginashun iffin you ain’t got a shirt)
Put the meat back in the pan
Open the cans of tomaters and beans and dump in the pan on top a the meat
Put the chili mix in the pan
Git yer sturrin stick and stur it up real good
Ya want to simmer it (that’s a fancy word fer cookin with little bubbles in the pot) bout 10-15 minutes
Lick yer stick an see iffin you need salt, pepper or anythun else what ya think might taste good and dump it in
When yer dun, ya should have bout 3-4 helpins. Iffin ya want more just figgur on putting more stuff in the pan. I tried it and iffin I put in 1 more can of tomaters and beans, some more roadkill and nuther 1 of thum there chili mix things, I got 6-8 helpins. I thought that was pretty amazin!
Now iffin yer one them folks don’t like roadkill or meat you can just leave it out an do the rest just like I told ya an itall still be good nuff to eat.
Iffin yer a real hillbilly or want to be sure you dun killed all the critters in yer roadkill, use tomaters and beans what says HOT on the can an add some that there stuff in the cute little bottle they call hot sauce to spice er up to where ya sweat real good when yer chowin down.